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MY Personal Perfect Diet and Exercise Plan

While the actual words “diet” and “exercise” were not in my New Year’s resolutions, that doesn’t mean I don’t climb gracelessly up the splintered side of that ugly old wagon every January. *sigh*

In my Christmas stocking (Santa looked suspiciously like my Youngest Daughter), was a jump rope. Huh… It’s a lot harder than I remember and not nearly as much fun as it used to be!

YD has also recently challenged me to be her workout buddy. We don’t work out together, but text each other before and/or after we’ve worked out, telling what we’ve accomplished and giving praise and encouragement. She is doing a Boot Camp DVD – show off!

I love to walk outside — hubby and I take the dogs on walks after dinner — but when the weather is in the “face of the sun” temps or raining steadily like it has been lately, I get on the treadmill. I like to walk while watching Regis & Kelly, Martha, Oprah or anything that makes me forget what I’m doing. I also try to do sit ups and some free weights.

Living in the land of sleeveless shirts most of the year, getting rid of the batwings would be good. I remember hearing about a woman who called them “Hi Helens” because she had a neighbor named Helen who would raise her arm and vigorously wave, calling out “Hi.”

So after many years of intense research and personal trial, I’ve developed the precise plan that works for me. I’ve found that I can’t eat while on the treadmill so…

  • Wake up.
  • Cup of coffee with fat free half & half.
  • Bowl of healthy cereal with skim milk.
  • Get on treadmill.
  • Walk until lunchtime.
  • Have a healthy lunch.
  • Get back on treadmill.
  • Walk until dinnertime.
  • Have a healthy dinner.
  • Shower (ewwwww).
  • Pass out from exhaustion.
  • Repeat.

See? No snacking or excess eating and I’m off the couch. Maybe I’ll start this new routine tomorrow or the next day or next week or next January!


4 Responses

  1. I tried using dance videos to make exercising more fun, until I overheard YS pick up the phone…”She can’t come to the phone right now, she’s doing salsa in the basement.” Too bad reading doesn’t burn calories.

    • At least she didn’t say you were eating salsa!

      I’ll bet our eyeballs have no excess fat from all the reading!!!

  2. Good luck on your exhaustion plan…..I’ll stick with…….

    …..and in a dark brown voice she said Yoga.
    Y – O – G – A Yoga yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga.

    It’s a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world except for
    Yoga. yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga.

    It’s my total zen and is harder than it looks!

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